About seven years ago I came back to the church from almost fifteen years of dabbling in some dark and nasty shit. Since then I have been searching for a church that can help me to except my failings, then I began to remember why I left the church in the first place. Priest ignore real issues of religious crisis. They would rather pander to the third world to be honest. Is that bad? Absolutely not...however maybe they would rather support another countries undesirables...maybe they shouldn't have there practice in North America where they are prone to ignore there own flocks pleas.
The priest here only seem to be really interested in the redistribution of wealth, and taking money from people and suckering them. This was one of my original grips about the church in the beginning, and the cause that lead me to the path of Satan. Oh yes, I worshiped the devil. I was hard core about it, I did it all. Drugs, senseless killing of animals....the works. I was hard core. I have a road map of suffering to prove my credentials to all you wanna-be's out there, just in case some smug atheist wants to make shit personal.
Then it occurred to me, that I wasn't mad at God or Jesus. I was angry with the Church. The Church shut its doors off to me, and treated me with a distain. I found god in my life seven years ago and never looked back, I talk with him on a daily basis. My life improved once I found god again, I wasn't pissed off all the time, when I was pissed off I found ways to cope and deal with my rage. Life is truly better when you do have teachings of Jesus Christ in your life, because they are simple but effective fixes.
So Why am I writing this?
I wanted to go back to church for a long time, but I am treated as an outsider. The Church is NOT as excepting as it claims to be, the priest are often self absorbed. No body wants to talk about anything, most Catholic's are not even really Catholic's. They just go for the social function, in order to stay busy.
In my searches I suddenly began to have a crisis of faith, I wasn't sure what I was doing anymore. I wanted to speak with someone to find some sort of answers. So one day I sat down and wrote a series of letters to the following churches for any answers.
Saint Marys San Francisco.
Saint Michaels N. Ireland.
Saint Andrews Canada.
In the letter I stated the following.
To (insert parish name)
My name is (me). I am a Catholic that is currently having a difficult time with my faith. I see the church taking many bizarre stances on issues that go against the teachings of Jesus Christ.
(List examples)
I need some help to understand what is going on, and why the Church and the Vatican is supporting these things. I am having a crisis of faith because these things are effecting my community negatively and I don't think this is what God was trying to teach us.
I am loosing my faith in the Catholic Church, and so far I have not received answers to anything.
If you can not give me any answers maybe you can direct me to a church or religion that may provide one?
I hope this letter finds you well.
Sincerely.
(me)
I wrote this letter two months ago, and I have not herd back from any of them.
So the Church is Silent on my questions, and once again like 25 years ago I find the doors to the church shut off to me. I am not going to run to the devil again, this time I will consult with God directly. I read the bible and did some studying and discovered that God is not strictly the property of the Catholic Church.
So I am considering converting to the Romanian Orthodox Church, but how do I do it? I don't know anything about Orthodox Christians, and to start over this late is going to be a laborious task. Well...you gotta put the work in if you want to get something done. I am ready to make the change, and see where it takes me. I have researched it for a while now, and it might be nice to meet with some like minded people.
Well this is my blog post for the day. I wish it was more exciting, but it was something that I was flipping around in my mind. I felt like this story was important because I know a lot of people are dealing with a crisis of faith right now, as I have noticed that the Catholic Church has completely abandon its North American flock and drown there voices out. It is sad, because our voices should matter and we are truly devout people. The pope however has made it clear he has no intention of supporting us, and he intends to trample on our faith. He has forgotten himself, believing that he holds the keys to heaven...but he is only a poster child to the gates of hell. I would warn all other Catholics to be wary of this pope, for he goes against the teaching of Christ and he panders to what is popular and not the practical. He is also willing to abandon his flock in a moments notice, to aid those who would slaughter his flock. You have been warned.
